Double Dipping Again.. Pouring My Heart & Cleaning Out The Closet

I'm extremely choosy of what blog carnivals/Blog Hops/Memes I choose to participate in. And honestly, I only participate in a couple. Here they are...

For The Love Of Blogs'




and Shell's



**Before we proceed further... Let it be known upfront that with BOTH of these blog hop's rules, NO NEGATIVITY is allowed in the comments of the post. So go by the cardinal rule. "If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all". Leave it at the door and post negativity on YOUR OWN posts/blogs.**

I love my family. I really do. I love being a wife and a mother. I love to volunteer at the school that my children attend. I love watching movies as a family. And doing things as a family.

But a fellow Blogger (Tough Cookie Mommy) and her post REALLY got me thinking.. When is it MY turn for ME? She is going through the same "crisis".

I'd grown up as an only child. After my medical catastrophe at birth, my mom didn't want to chance having another baby "like me". After my mom died my paternal grandmother moved herself in against my dad's wishes and "parented" me. That's where my life of "privacy" waned and went to the wind.

Ever since then, be it under my father's roof, living with roommates or with my former or current husbands and our children, I have never really gotten the chance to do for ME. All my decisions and what I do are intricately centered (rimarily) around the kids and my husband.

I can't shower (most of the time) without at least one person busting in to use the bathroom. Using the toilet even can be a non-singular chore.

Television? I have to try and watch my ABC Soaps in the afternoon (nothing is really appealing to me in the morning hours) before my kids are home. Then no more TV for me until 9:00 at night if I'm lucky and/or not too tired.

Naps...Can't take them in the middle of the day. It's "unnatural" to me. I take them in the evening, after dinner, if I feel that I need one. My husband sleeps for a while after coming home from work in the afternoon. When he sleeps (past when the kids get home from school) NO ONE disturbs him for anything. IF I take one, then all three kids (most times) come in one after another to ask me something...HELLO! You DO have a dad to ask to. Ya know?

There are days that I honestly ask myself the age-old question of many mothers/wives, especially of those of us (like myself) thanks to Reba McEntire, "Is There Life Out There"?

I KNOW I am *more* than JUST a "wife". I am *more* than just a "mother". I am STILL a person. A human being. One who STILL likes to have ME time to figure MYSELF out. Be it during a nap. Or during an uninterrupted shower. Or even having the ability to say MY turn for what I wish to watch on the Television or on DVD.

It's bad enough that my husband and I NEVER, EVER (or shall we say quite rarely do we) get an entire evening alone. Be it to go out or just hang out quietly at home. It's worse to know that you are ONLY being seen as a "wife" or as a "mom".

Perfection Perception... Fail.

Ya know what? I wasn't planning on writing on here at all today. I was going to jot some stuff tomorrow. But now, I HAVE TO SAY IT! You all know me well enough by now, that if I have it on my mind, I have to type it out.

Well, technically, I already did. Over at Momster.com. But I felt that I needed to bring it here too. It's a smallishly tweaked version of what I said over at the Fan Page for Momster.com over at Facebook. I tweaked it so that it has an overall umbrella addressing ALL parents, not just moms. Because, I have seen and heard fathers say the exact same thing.

So, without further ado...


I'm sorry but some parents are INSANE when it comes to grades..."Expects NOTHING less than an A"??? WOW! Talk about pressure. That is expecting WAAAY too much.

All three of my kids are advanced and I know that they have wonderful potential. But I REFUSE to say "you cannot earn LESS than an A". Your kids can't fill the void that (maybe) you lacked when it came to school grades.

And while they are smart, they CANNOT be perfect at EVERY single subject. It's unrealistic to think that.

I'm perfectly fine with a C or better. D is cause for concern and a talk. An F constitutes concern, the talk, and privileges taken until grades improve.

Parent's expectations HAVE TO BE within reason. Saying you only expects A's and nothing less is being in an imaginary world.

How would you all like it if (even though you have the potential) your parents told you that if you don't get all A's, all the time, that you would be in trouble. And think of the CONSTANT pressure and fear. Do you REALLY want that for your children?