Putting My Worst Face Foward...

I didn't always see myself as "pretty". In honestly any sense of the word.

I was your average American tomboy girl. I loved being barefoot, in jeans or shorts and a comfy shirt. I hated dresses and makeup. In fact, I rarely, if ever wear either of the latter to this day. And I'm about to turn thirty-five.

As a teen, I had your basic teen acne. Or so I'd thought. I had some pretty icky breakouts. Especially around the time of a hormonal flux at the nearing of my menstrual cycle.

After years of trying everything, by my 19th birthday, it all just went away. I went on with my life. Had gotten married, had a child, divorced. Remarried, had two more children. Also I'd lost a child in between the middle and youngest.

That's also when my breakouts came back. Right near the loss of that baby in 2003. And they came back with a vengeance.

After having my youngest child, who is now seven years old, and in the First Grade, things only had become worse. But I figured that over time, with my hormones getting back to a normal level, everything would just clear up again.

Oh how WRONG was I with that assumption. If anything, they had become worse.

By the time she was a year old, my face went to looking like this with Rosacea...

And yes, it steadily got worse than this. To the point that it hurt me emotionally, psychologically and even socially.

I hated leaving my home. I didn't like to be out in public. Not looking like that! People would stare. Little children would ask what happened to my face, as they pointed and had that look of disgust upon their faces.

There were times that I was even embarrassed to be around my family, wondering what they thought of how I looked. On occasion certain members of the family would "grill" me on what I ate, what I used to clean my face and whatnot.

I did NOTHING wrong. I ate NOTHING wrong. It was NOT my fault. But it certainly felt like I did SOMETHING wrong.

Eventually the Rosacea went in to an area of the body I had NEVER heard of it even being possible.

My eyes. But it primarily attacked my left eyeball. And I went to a Ophthalmologist who sadly MISTREATED me for the wrong infection. In the end, the Ocular Rosacea (Subtype 4) ate away most of the cornea (outer window of the pupil that is your eye's lens) in the left eye.

At times, my face looked like this man's...

And yes, my eye would like like the one in this picture...

In the end, after my cornea had perforated (had a hole in it), I looked like this..

Not even two weeks later, thanks to Ocular Rosacea eating away my cornea, I had no choice but to have an emergency-based Corneal Transplant (Keratoplasty) and required a full graft of another person's cornea after they had died and were an organ/tissue donor.

Here I am 2-weeks post-op...

And here I am 2 YEARS later...

As for the Rosacea, it is now under control!! I am on Doxycycline pills. And will most likely be on and off of them for the rest of my life.

Plus, soon, seeing as I can no longer have children, we are going to try a cream medication after removing me from the Doxycycline pills in a few months. And if need be, I may even end up being on both to ensure that when I have an "attack of the pimple kind", it will not be that bad, and will be staved off from being inside my eye.

Here I am today, pimple/Rosacea free (for the most part)...

I still have breakouts. Mainly around my cycle. But it's now just a bump here and a bump there. Yes, they CAN be painful, swelled and very red. But at least I'm NOWHERE near as horrible looking as back in the time of my youngest being a baby.

I'm more confident, knowledgeable about my conditions and am no longer afraid to walk out of my home, only to face ridicule from strangers young and old.

It's Almost Time...And I Had To Spend WAY Too Much!

We finally got all of the school supply shopping done. Between three kids, it cost almost ninety dollars. That included a pair of shoes for the boy (girls already got new shoes). Back in MY day (God, I just made myself sound older than dirt) my parents didn't have to buy all these things. Especially the extras. Like antibacterial wipes, hand sanitizer and facial tissue.

Also, I don't ever recall needing more than TWO glue sticks. These days, kids need three LARGE or a dozen (or six, depending on grade and teacher preference) small sticks of glue.

The only things I had to take were my Trapper Keeper binder that had a few folders and the dividers, pencils, crayons and scissors in a pencil pouch and my lunch. Of course all in my awesome looking backpack.

I didn't get to take in the Tax-Free Weekend, sadly. But I was still able to find some pretty good deals, anyways. With three kids to shop for, I look for all the savings cuts I can when it comes to shopping for school that are listed.

I understand, that like us parents are, teachers are hurting economically, as are the schools themselves where funding is concerned. But to see some of the amounts PER item that they wish for us parents to buy really IS kind of obscene.

And no, I am NOT saying that the teachers and the schools should have to buy EVERYTHING...But why not pick up a little of the slack and provide the tissues, hand sanitizer and then antibacterial wipes? That would help US out.

The schools MUST also understand, that there are households (such as mine, included) that can only get so much PER child. With three children, all in school and all needing their supplies, it can be EXTREMELY difficult, financially.

Heck, even buying for one child can run you in to the ground, financially. Add in clothes, extra expenses (School Agendas, PE Uniforms, extra supplies for certain classes), it REALLY adds up.

I know that I may get a few teachers on here ready to jump me. But as a parent, I see that honestly, it is unfair to the parents to have to pretty much supply everything in the means of school supplies in the name of "free public education". It's NOT free when you are shelling out money you don't really have on things that should not be the parent's complete responsibility to supply.

Pens and pencils. Binders and backpacks. Uniforms (if required). Folders and dividers. Notebooks and composition books. That should be the END of the supply list.

Not that and a laundry list of other stuff.

I've got a friend who is financially hurting REALLY bad right now. Her daughter is going in to first grade, mom can't work, lives in low-income housing, and her nineteen-year-old son is helping with what little he has left over to get his baby sister at least SOME of her supplies.

Mom had to give up GROCERY money to buy those wipes, sanitizers and tissues. And to get a few pieces for the girl's uniforms.

I told her not to worry about the piddly crap, because the teacher WILL just have to understand and she will have MORE than plenty between the ones that will bring it all in.

She told me, with a shaky voice that she did it as to not be viewed as THAT mom. The one that is too damn dirt poor to get ANYTHING for her kid. To save her little girl from the good possibility of being made fun of for not having money.

The parents at our schools, and ALL the other schools in the country have parents with ALL variants of income status. Some dirt-ass poor. Some more than well-off. And some of us in the middle or are just keeping our heads above the water.

NO parent should feel in ANY way forced or coerced in to buying items that they CANNOT afford and have to make the choices (as a single parent) as she has had to do. All in the name of keeping her dignity in tact and making sure that her daughter isn't bullied because Mommy can't just go out and buy this, that and everything else on a whim.

If we are in a Public School setting where it is a "FREE public education", then by God, make it so! By not asking for the parents to do ALL the financial supplementation for YOUR classroom.

My baby Graduated!...And she isn't even in High School yet. (=

On Friday, we had our last day of school for the Summer. We here in the city were on the College schedule and had almost a month-long Winter Break, a shorter Spring Break, got out of school twenty minutes later than last year. To say it was effed up is an understatement.

First off, I am happy to report that Hayley made a perfect 600 on her Math SOL. She also made advanced score on Science, and "proficient" on Reading (though she is an average of a level 10th grade reading level, but was one question shy of "advanced" on the test..big whoop, right?). Social Studies score will be mailed, seeing as they took it late and the results took longer than we had.

It was SUCH a busy week where school was concerned. Friday was the "pay off" day for about sixty or so fifth graders in our school. They made it. EVERY SINGLE ONE. We have a 100% Graduation/Advancement Rate going on to the area's Middle Schools in the Fall.

In their honor, they and their parents and other selected (by the students) family members were treated to a Graduation Breakfast, by a fellow mom who's daughter is also moving on to Middle School.

Our Guest Speaker was Lynchburg City Mayor, Joan Foster. Her last, and most profound sentence to the kids were, "Follow YOUR vision and let no one negative get in the way of your dreams".

          (Mayor Foster speaking to the kids..and to us parents, who got a round of applause, too.)

           (Mayor Foster with Hayley (in red) and her close BFF who will be in a different school.)

              (Hayley with her BFF in green and homeroom 5th grade teacher, along with her other good friend.)

              (Her Science and Social Studies Teacher, whom she ADORED (not saying she didn't love HR Teacher, too! lol))

Distorting the FACTS from the MYTHS About Organ/Tissue/Eye Donation

The following are the Myths and the Facts about being or becoming an Organ/Tissue/Eye Donor.

Information (copy/pasted) is provided by the Mayo Clinic.

Myth: If I agree to donate my organs, the hospital staff won't work as hard to save my life.

Fact: When you go to the hospital for treatment, doctors focus on saving your life — not somebody else's. You'll be seen by a doctor whose specialty most closely matches your particular emergency. The doctor in charge of your care has nothing to do with transplantation.
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Myth: Maybe I won't really be dead when they sign my death certificate.

Fact: Although it's a popular topic in the tabloids, in reality, people don't start to wiggle their toes after they're declared dead. In fact, people who have agreed to organ donation are given more tests (at no charge to their families) to determine that they're truly dead than are those who haven't agreed to organ donation.
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Myth: Organ donation is against my religion.

Fact: Organ donation is consistent with the beliefs of most religions. This includes Catholicism, Protestantism, Islam and most branches of Judaism. If you're unsure of or uncomfortable with your faith's position on donation, ask a member of your clergy. Another option is to check the federal Web site OrganDonor.gov, which provides religious views on organ donation and transplantation by denomination.
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Myth: I'm under age 18. I'm too young to make this decision.

Fact: That's true, in a legal sense. But your parents can authorize this decision. You can express to your parents your wish to donate, and your parents can give their consent knowing that it's what you wanted. Children, too, are in need of organ transplants, and they usually need organs smaller than those an adult can provide.
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Myth: An open-casket funeral isn't an option for people who have donated organs or tissues.

Fact: Organ and tissue donation doesn't interfere with having an open-casket funeral. The donor's body is clothed for burial, so there are no visible signs of organ or tissue donation. For bone donation, a rod is inserted where bone is removed. With skin donation, a very thin layer of skin similar to a sunburn peel is taken from the donor's back. Because the donor is clothed and lying on his or her back in the casket, no one can see any difference.
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Myth: I'm too old to donate. Nobody would want my organs.

Fact: There's no defined cutoff age for donating organs. Organs have been successfully transplanted from donors in their 70s and 80s. The decision to use your organs is based on strict medical criteria, not age. Don't disqualify yourself prematurely. Let the doctors decide at your time of death whether your organs and tissues are suitable for transplantation.
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Myth: I'm not in the best of health. Nobody would want my organs or tissues.

Fact: Very few medical conditions automatically disqualify you from donating organs. The decision to use an organ is based on strict medical criteria. It may turn out that certain organs are not suitable for transplantation, but other organs and tissues may be fine. Don't disqualify yourself prematurely. Only medical professionals at the time of your death can determine whether your organs are suitable for transplantation.
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Myth: I'd like to donate one of my kidneys now, but I wouldn't be allowed to do that unless one of my family members is in need.

Fact: While that used to be the case, it isn't any longer. Whether it's a distant family member, friend or complete stranger you want to help, you can donate a kidney through certain transplant centers. If you decide to become a living donor, you will undergo extensive questioning to ensure that you are aware of the risks and that your decision to donate isn't based on financial gain. You will also undergo testing to determine if your kidneys are in good shape and whether you can live a healthy life with just one kidney.
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Myth: Rich and famous people go to the top of the list when they need a donor organ.

Fact: The rich and famous aren't given priority when it comes to allocating organs. It may seem that way because of the amount of publicity generated when celebrities receive a transplant, but they are treated no differently from anyone else. In fact, the United Network for Organ Sharing (UNOS), the organization responsible for maintaining the national organ transplant network, subjects all celebrity transplants to an internal audit to make sure the organ allocation was appropriate.
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Myth: My family will be charged if I donate my organs.

Fact: The organ donor's family is never charged for donating. The family is charged for the cost of all final efforts to save your life, and those costs are sometimes misinterpreted as costs related to organ donation. Costs for organ removal go to the transplant recipient.

(Not So) Hot For Teacher

As most of my readers know, I love volunteering at the school where my three children attend. I primarily work with the Kindergarten classroom that my daughter, Skyler resides at during the school day.

But right now, I'm not very happy with the school and how they are handling the transition of my daughter's class.

First, right before Thanksgiving, the Student Teacher had left after her fifteen weeks of "shadowing" and teaching the class was done as to be able to graduate and get her Teaching Certificate/License. The kids took her going away pretty hard, being that they had grown attached to her, and her to them. She was outstanding! And I loved working with her in the classroom.

Then, just as Winter Break loomed upon us, the second to the last day of school before break began, we got a letter from their teacher letting us know she was forced to resign due to health issues. So needless to say, the Christmas Party I put together for the class also became a Going Away/We'll Miss You party, as well.

Now, for almost an entire month, they've been doing the hiring process to replace the teacher in the Kindergarten classroom. And for at least another two weeks, starting YESTERDAY, there will be a substitute running the class.

There's a few problems with this though..

1) What's her name? None of the kids can tell us. Why? Because according to what many of us moms compared, she NEVER told them! Or said Miss B.

2) Where's the Daily Folder that they are to bring home everyday? Not in my hands! According to the kids, she will send them home today.

3) Subs...Is this one constant for the next two weeks, or are they rotating them?

4) Morning Routine (Calendar, weather, Wall Words, Days of the Week) were NOT done. In fact, according to the kids they did basically NOTHING of their routine or much of anything else the ENTIRE day. Just some coloring and Carpet Time...twice.

It would have been nice to have SOMETHING sent home on the first day as to who the person is and how long that they are staying with the kids (projected time) until they finalize the hiring process.

Us parents were forced to send our Kindergarten-age children to school to be taught by some "stranger" for the next two weeks. That alone was bad enough. But to STILL not know a thing about the person, quite possibly until the next day, to me is utterly absurd and disrespectful of the kids and of us as their parents.

In the event that nothing again is sent home as promised, according to the kids (getting their folders sent home), and especially if there is nothing pertaining to the teacher (introduction letter), then there's a number of us parents that are ready to go as a group on Thursday to the school and confront the matter. We don't like "smoke and mirrors" when it comes to entrusting our SMALL children to others that we know nothing about. We want answers and to know who this person is. Is that really too much to ask?

This is also making me decide firmly at this point, that on Friday I WILL indeed be at school for my Volunteer day as usual. This way, the kids will have SOMEONE that they know and are used to in their environment. Plus I know who tries to pull what, who is sensitive (sensory-wise), who has behavior problems that are out of their control and who are shadows (monkey-see-monkey-do) {mainly if seeing another kid is truly ill feeling}.

What a way to begin the last half of the school year, the beginning of 2011 and the start of a new school week.

Yes, Virginia, words *CAN* hurt.

Words. They are probably the most powerful tool that we possess as human beings. They can be used to encourage, relate with and help in the healing process. They can also cut like a knife, aggravate and maim another to their very core.

Some words, while spelled the same, can have two very differential meanings. Take the word "ship". One is a boat that floats on the water, carrying people abroad from one piece of land to another. The other "ship" means to carry items from one location to another for people through a mailing service.

But the word that we will be focusing on that has become ever so quite popular to use in various context is "retard/retarded".

From Dictionary Reference ...

"re·tard·ed"

[ri-tahr-did]

–adjective

1.characterized by retardation: a retarded child.
–noun

2.( used with a plural verb ) mentally retarded persons collectively (usually prec. by the ): new schools for the retarded.

Origin:
1800–10; retard + -ed2

—Related forms
non·re·tard·ed, adjective
un·re·tard·ed, adjective

—Synonyms
backward, disabled, handicapped.

"re·tard"

[ri-tahrd, for 1–3, 5; ree-tahrd for 4]

–verb (used with object)
1.to make slow; delay the development or progress of (an action, process, etc.); hinder or impede.

–verb (used without object)
2.to be delayed.

–noun
3.a slowing down, diminution, or hindrance, as in a machine.

4.Slang: Disparaging .

a.a mentally retarded person.

b.a person who is stupid, obtuse, or ineffective in some way: a hopeless social retard.

5.Automotive, Machinery . an adjustment made in the setting of the distributor of an internal-combustion engine so that the spark for ignition in each cylinder is generated later in the cycle.

[End of definitions]

Now, in all the years that I have gone with my father, my husband or on my own to the Mechanic to get my vehicle checked have I ever heard the word "retarded" come out of their mouths to describe the setting of my car's distributor.

I have though, heard of those with mentally debilitating handicaps being referred to as being "retarded" or being a "retard". Both by the medical community, and through society's "common man". And honestly, I literally cringe when I hear those words. No matter their context.

My daughter has a friend who's younger sister is severely handicapped. She cannot walk. She cannot talk. She cannot eat normally like you and I do. But she is sharp. She can bounce around her home with ease upon her knees. She can speak through a "voice box" communications computer, or uses sign language. And she must eat through a bottle, seeing as her "food" has to be in almost a completely liquid consistency.

She has Cerebral Palsy. She is what people would call "retarded". But after you see all that she CAN do, she can place most of us "normal" people to shame. My children play with her at school and within their home. She and I have fun talking and she is ALWAYS giving me hugs and when she sees me in passing at school, the biggest smile comes to her face and she is about to bounce out of her wheelchair to get to me and wants to high-five me.

My biggest pet peeve though, with the words "retard" and "retarded" is when they are used in a non-medical, derogatory manner. Saying to someone, "You are such a retard!" is not only insulting towards the person you are referring to, but to those that REALLY DO have mentally challenging handicaps.

And when you say, "That's retarded.", you are insinuating that something is "slow, stupid, obtuse or ineffective". But listen to yourself as you say it. It's on the same level as stating "That is so gay!". So something is having a relationship with it's own kind? That made no sense. And it insults those in your community that ARE in fact, Gay.

How would people like to hear something along the lines of "It's so nigger."? Sounds great, doesn't it? *insert eye roll here*

Or how about "Stop being such a Jew!"?

My son has several mental disorders that have in the end, deemed him disabled by the state and by the Federal Government. He is NOT stupid, slow, defective, a socially inept being, or a hindrance. He is my son, who is bright-minded with some quirks. He is disabled emotionally, socially, maturely and mentally (to an extent).

What are his disorders, you ask (for those that are new to my blog, or just don't know)? He has ADHD, OCD, ODD, Mood Disorder (basically, he has Bipolar, but due to age, is Dx'd with the Mood Disorder until later in age), and Asperger's Syndrome 'tendencies' (he does not have full-blown Asperger's, but is borderline).

He can be violent, abusive and easily short tempered. He cannot handle change well (especially sudden or massive changes at one time). He has Manic-type mood swings with outward evidences of 'highs' and 'lows' (extreme hyperness or extreme sadness) at any given moment of each day.

But on the flip side, my child is one of the most loving, caring, affectionate, brightest children you would ever meet. With even his bad days, it's hard to NOT love him or want to do your best by him. No matter the cost.

The one thing my son is *NOT* is "retarded". By ANY meaning of the word. I certainly would NEVER let a medical professional refer to him as being such, let alone anyone within "general society". He is handicapped or "challenged". Nothing more. Nothing less.

So, before you (generalizing the word 'you', not pointing fingers to any specific person) go and state that someone is a "retard" for any reason, or say that something is "retarded", think BEFORE you speak those words from your lips. Because once you say them, you can NEVER take them back.

Even those within the medical community have started the change from using the words "retard" and "retarded", seeing the hurt and anguish those two 'simple' words bring to those that ARE affected by mental and physical disabilities, as well as their families and friends.

That alone should tell you something. That wording and context are EVERYTHING. So yes, while sticks and stones may break bones, names (and misuse of words) *CAN* hurt. Especially those that know of someone, or they themselves are personally affected with being handicapped.

Please if you wish to help stop the spreading of the "R-Word" in it's wrong verbiage, join me at...




I have taken the pledge. Will you?


Also, while I am NO fan of severe Right-Wing Conservatism, nor am I NOWHERE near a 'fan' of Sarah Palin, I WILL agree with her anger and I WILL side with Palin in regards to Rush Limbaugh's uses of "retard" and "retarded". Even as he referred to those that REALLY ARE cognitively and developmentally disabled persons.





Don't even get me started on Ann Coulter...

And here I thought KIDS were bad.

Apparently, in most cases, the PARENTS seemingly are no better. And you wonder why I have a MAJOR beef with "fanatical" right-wing Christians and organized religion.

Over on my BFF, Angel's blog she posted a Vlog in regards to a fellow blogger, and one of her bloggy friends, who's son was bullied. To read that post, please feel free to CLICK HERE.

The reason so many of us are up in arms, is due to the fact, that the person in the second link had their SON dressing up as "Daphne" from "Scooby Doo". She made sure several times before ordering that indeed that is what her 5-YEAR-OLD son wanted to be. And he was quite adamant mind you, seeing as his BFF (a GIRL) was dressing as Scooby and wanted to pair up.

Now mind you, this all had taken place in a CHRISTIAN Preschool setting. Where they are taught Pre-Kindergarten concepts and that Jesus says we are to love one another no matter what and to treat others like how we wish to be treated. With love and respect.

Now, if you know me AT ALL, you know for a fact, I'm not one to post Biblical verses. I am a Christian, but not a Bible wielding one that will thump you over the head with the Good Book like bonking you with a ball bat. But just for today, I feel like quoting some Scripture.

Scripture text is derived by the Bible Gateway Site...

Matthew 22:37-40 (New International Version)

37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’[a] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[b] 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

In other words, if YOU wish to NOT be torn down and demand to be accepted and respected, you damn well better be willing to reciprocate in return.

Wow! The verses I found for you HYPOCRITE Christians out there!! Ready?

Psalm 26:4 (New International Version)-4 "I do not sit with the deceitful, nor do I associate with hypocrites."

Matthew 7:5-"You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye."

Matthew 23:13-[Seven Woes on the Teachers of the Law and the Pharisees ] “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You shut the door of the kingdom of heaven in people’s faces. You yourselves do not enter, nor will you let those enter who are trying to."

Who can claim the name "Christian" when they are hypocrites to the tenth degree? And against a CHILD no less. Who has ANY right to judge another being? For ANY reason due to being different and "out of the box" where the "normalcy of society" is of any concern? Not myself. Not you. Not anyone. I should only judge my own misdeeds, and the misdeeds of my children. But all others should be left to the Lord God Almighty to judge for Himself. For HE is the ONLY true Judge of any one of us.

Luke 6:37-“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven."

As a child, and for the majority of it, I was judged and ridiculed. By both children and adults alike. Of course, I felt that it was both parties' faults. It wasn't until later in years, say in my teens, that I had come to an eye-opening conclusion. I should NEVER have blamed the children. But the parents that had raised them.

Children are NOT born to hate and ridicule others in the world. They were TAUGHT to do so. By example and the leading of their parents. I remember COUNTLESS times where I had walked in the door from school, sullen, sometimes tears streaming down my cheeks and being quiet and reserved. All because again, I was picked on for looking different from the other children. And many of them that did this to me were fellow members of our church that I had attended as a child.

My parents had the cops called on them due to the fact that they parked in a Handicapped Zone LEGALLY. But to the old lady, I didn't "look handicapped enough" to need such a spot.

My father almost got in to a fist brawl in a grocery store checkout lane thanks to some idiot ADULT stating that "if I had a kid that LOOKED like that, I wouldn't let it out the house" (thanks to the trache, tubes and monitor wires I required to be hooked up to for day trips from the hospital).

How in the hell can ADULTS, let alone human beings, be so damned cruel? Especially towards CHILDREN? It's so beyond my comprehension, it scares me.

So, this poor mother and her child had to endure horrid comments about HIS choice of costume for this past Halloween. And she got it for "letting him wear THAT". So obviously (and quite sadly) those "mothers" pegged the kid as being Gay. So what, if he is?? He is OBVIOUSLY quite comfortable in his own skin. His mother is proud of him for being HIMSELF. Not some "image" of what or who OTHERS "think" he should "be like".

Parents and people in general such as these "Christian" hypocrites outright DISGUST me. Yep, I said it! They D-I-S-G-U-S-T me. They are a very small fraction of the type of people that just chap my hide. They are two-faced, corners-of-the-mouth speaking snakes in my eyes.

So remember everyone, do *not* blame the children who speak ill of others, for they know not fully what they are doing is wrong. Blame their parents and any other adult-centered influences within their lives. Because it's the ADULTS that are "bringing up" these children to be, act and think how they are doing so. All we can do as REAL Christians is love them and gently correct them and the errors of their words and/or ways.

For the children we are bringing up today will be our future that will bring up tomorrow.

Daydreaming, ADHD & Team Building

It's been a strange start to the week. Monday wasn't too bad as far as Monday's go. Tuesday was Election Day for Mid-Terms. I even voted for Tazmanian Devil to get City Court Clerk. Instead some idiot I have no clue about got the spot. I think Taz would have done a fine job myself. And last night was also the monthly appointment for Bryce, my Special Needs child.

It's becoming increasingly apparent that the medications that he is on for the ADHD are helping. But not to the extent that we would care to see. He is on the maximum dose of Vyvanse. And we are upping his Intuniv to three mgs. to see if that may help a bit more.

But also, the teachers MUST be willing to work more with him. And with us. In a COMPLETE team effort. They have yet to realize that NOT EVERYTHING he does is within HIS control. A lot of it has to do with the ADHD and its severity taking control and causing him to wander, be completely distracted, blurting out, cutting in to conversations or instruction. He even said one of the teachers mainly lectures for the entire time, every single day. An ADHD kid CANNOT handle more than five to ten minute increments of "lecturing".

These people are expecting him to pull off the impossible. To stay on task, focus completely and listen 100% of the time, during the entire day. While us "normal" people CAN do that, a child with severe ADHD cannot. They do not have the control over their brains to obtain such feats.

Even the doctor had agreed with me when I stated that basically my child is in a constant daydream. His brain NEVER slows down enough to tackle one specific thing at a time. His mind is a jumbled mess twenty-four hours a day, unless people are willing to re-direct him, work with him and help ensure that he is keeping on track with the task at hand.

For the last several years, myself and Bryce's Case Manager have hit one stumbling block after another. Even though Bryce is listed BY THE STATE, as well as by FEDERAL GOVERNMENT (seeing as he DOES collect SSDI) as being "disabled", my child has been turned down time and time again for in-school services. This means he cannot get an IEP, a 504 Plan, most accommodations. Why? Because he is SO damn smart and "making the grade", that his disability isn't "showing" enough through his grades to "mandate needs" for Specialized Services through the school system.

Excuse me??? So in a nut shell, they are stating that being my child does not have a severe intellectual impediment, he isn't deaf or blind, can walk and talk just like any other "normal" person, that he does NOT qualify for a damn thing, seeing as he DOES have behavioral issues that severely impact social skills and daily living skills. Just getting him to do a five minute task can take easily twenty minutes or more.

At school, about three weeks ago, he was SUPPOSED TO go to the bathroom that sits kitty-corner from the classroom. But about ten minutes later, he was found to be down the hall at the Second Grade area, just standing there, watching in to one of the classrooms. And he honestly cannot say why, or how he "got there".

He is ALWAYS "forgetting" his FINISHED homework. No matter how much I have tried, the boy is incessantly disorganized with his binder.

All he does is get in to trouble in school for wandering the room, not staying on task, speaking out of turn, bugging the other students in class, not following (multiple) directions (which is EXTREMELY hard for Bryce to accomplish), wandering the halls and being a "behavioral nuisance".

Now, someone PLEASE DO tell me, how are these "problems" that the teachers are always complaining of NOT being addressed in their correct manner? As in, with Specialized Services being readily available and in use with and for my child? How bad does it honestly have to get with his behavior and "daydreaming" for them to FINALLY take a hard look and actually GIVE HIM the services Bryce is RIGHTFULLY due?

Honestly, sometimes Public Education amazes me. And *not* in a good way, mind you. So, if I seem angry in this post, and in general, you can bet your ass I am! I'm tired of the run-arounds, the blind-eyes and the refusal to HELP my child live up to his full potential and get the best educational opportunity available.

ADHD...

As a mother, it is hard to watch your child struggle. What are ordinary, everyday tasks and expectations to us, is a ball of confusion and frustration for our kids.

Sitting still. Focusing. Being organized. Paying attention to the instructor. Following multiple directions at a rapid pace.

Sounds like a lot, and even a bit confusing to you? I'm sure that it does. But to my son, and to millions of other children in the United States alone, it is a hardship for them every single day to keep up with those tasks while in the classroom, and even at home.

Constantly, I have to remind my hyper, active, not-very-attentive son to complete this task first, so he can move on to the next. Then, after that, I have to remind him to let me check his work against his Agenda, to ensure that he completed the assignments. Then, and only then, may he have his computer or his TV time.

The same goes for his household chores. And the teachers have to stay on top of Bryce as well, being he can fall off of the track pretty quick, and pretty often.

Case in point.. Bryce was found to be sitting in the hall, by his Science and Social Studies Teacher's room. Apparently, he was disrupting the class and "poking at" one girl constantly. After being told to finally move himself to an area where he could be alone, he started to bawl and be belligerent. So, the teacher sent him to the hall.

Then, at snack time, when the Mixed Berries were passed out, he couldn't have any, being that the kitchen never made him a separate bowl without the Blackberries, being he is allergic to them. He went buck wild, pitching a fit, not concentrating on the teacher's explanation, and saying he was being abused because she was "starving" him.

It's not ALL stemming from his ADHD. The lashing out is from another disorder he is inflicted with. But the "poking" of the child, his fidgeting, his lack of concentration, and organization skills, as well as his hyperness, even in his talking to others is a part of the ADHD that he has. Bryce has the more severe form of the disorder.

And yes, he is on medication therapy for it. He takes Vyvanse in the morning, before school. His Intuniv is taken before bedtime. It also serves as a sleep aide, being that his brain stays in "overdrive". The Intuniv relaxes the centers in the brain to control his sleep pattern. And it helps him focus on going to sleep, along with his bedtime routine rituals.

One thing that I have noted the last few years, as the parent of an ADHD child that is medicated, is that most (not all, mind you) teachers think that the medication is the "magic cure-all" for the ADHD while the child is in their classroom. That cannot be further from the truth.

While the medications DO help the child stay focused, attentive, and with less likelihood to blurt out or talk out of turn (or even go way off the topic at hand), the medicines can only control those points to a certain extent.

The remainder of the ADHD child's success relies upon both the child's willingness to gain SELF-control and SELF-discipline, as well as the teacher's willingness to work with the child to achieve those same goals that ADHD students need to be successful students.

This may mean giving the ADHD child a separate desk area, where fellow students will not be a distraction. Or even asking the child if the student is understanding and able to follow the lesson. The teacher can't be "all mouth". They must be about action as well. This means walking around, using hand gestures. Anything to keep the ADHD child engaged in the lesson.

On average, the typical ADHD child can give you no more than fifteen minutes of their attention. For the ones with severe ADHD, you are lucky, and I mean LUCKY, to get ten minutes of their attention, being most severe cases have an attention span of only five minutes.

Too many teachers rely on medication therapy. And anti-medicating advocates talk about us parents? MOST of us parents tried EVERYTHING else under the sun for our children BEFORE going the "pill route".

Our child's first line of defense of course, are the parents. Then, the doctors and therapeutic team. Teachers though, as well as the other school staff round out the team for these kids. We ALL have to work together to help these children with ADHD be successful . Within the classroom setting, as well as out in the community and within the world.

So, remember that while ADHD medications DO help, it's far from being the "cure-all" route of having a successful child. One-on-one working with your child (or student, if that is the case), providing the appropriate tools for success, and helping them to build their SELF-esteem and SELF-control are the REAL keys for having an ADHD child that is well-rounded, adjusted, organized and an overall good student in the classroom and beyond.

First Day of School...In pictures.

This is going to be pretty much, a picture-filled post. So, be prepared, and don't say that I didn't warn you! (=

Yesterday it was the first day back to school for most of my area. Including the city, as well as one county next to us. Another county above us started back LAST week (had to make up for time lost from last year's Winter Storm). 

I'd been waiting for the day to come for a good part of the Summer. Now, don't get me wrong here. I love my kids. I love spending time with them. What I don't love was the CONSTANT bickering, fighting, not cleaning up after themselves, eating me out of house and home, and thinking that I could take them places EVERY single day.

So, as their vacation ended, with having to board the bus for school, my vacation started, and I am now slowly getting my sanity back once more.

Here's some pictures from the start of the day...

As you can see, Hayley is not very happy. Why? Because I was *all* smiles as I took this picture as I hummed "Aud Lang Syne" (the 'Happy New Year' song).

Weebles was making the wait for the school bus a tab bit less excruciating.

"Where in the heck is that danged school bus? I'm ready to get them out of here FINALLY and get some peace and quiet!"... Don't worry Weebles, Mommy was thinking the exact same thing.

Weebles gave Bryce one last "kiss and hug" before the bus started up to the house.

This mom's a happy camper now! The bus is just about to start up from the corner street behind me. I saw the kids getting on, and knew we were next in less than a minute.

Here it comes! Skyler I think was the ONLY one out of the bunch to be THAT excited.

Run on to the bus my children!!...I even yelled out 'Happy New (School) Year!!' as they were boarding the bus. Not a tear shed, either. I was more than ready and happy to see them go.

...And off they go! On their two-minute ride up the street to school.

Then right after, I had to walk up to the school and take care of some minor business concerning a couple of the kids. While there, I was able to get a few pictures of my nephew, who is also, along with Skyler, starting Kindergarten.

Isn't he just handsome?? In his white polo shirt, khaki pants, and holding on tight to the bag, and having his big-boy back-pack on his shoulders.

All in all, the first day of school went quiet well for most of the students and the staff. I'm glad that they are back in class. And now, old friends can reconnect, and new friendships and bonds can be formed. I so can't wait to start volunteering. I'm looking forward to this being a great school year!

Volunteering. It's that time again.

Have you ever done it? Volunteering, I mean. In your child's school.

Did you know that as a Volunteer, you do NOT have to work at the school its self? You can do some things as a Volunteer in the privacy and comfort of your own home, as well.

And another bonus? You do not have to have a child at the school to be a volunteer! You can be a grandparent, an aunt or uncle. Or just a local neighbor that wishes to lend a helping hand.

Some of the things that you can do at home as a Volunteer would be...

Cutting out soup labels or boxtops.

Make phone calls to get others to supply things such as snacks and juices for events.

Cut out letters, numbers, shapes and other needed decorations for classrooms or other areas of the school you choose to help.

There are also many things you can help with within the school's setting. And you do NOT have to be with your child's class, either.

You can...

Be a Room Parent that coordinates and heads class parties as per the school's allotment.

Help in the Library.

Help with Reading Classes.

Assist at the school's Book Fair(s) that are held once or even twice a year.

Help with After School Activities (such as dances).

There is something for EVERYONE to do. Talents and knowledge within all types of areas are needed and encouraged to be filled.

You just do not know how even (what seems to be) the simplest of "jobs" you do, be it from home, or within the school, can affect the children you serve, and the staff.

Kids and the staff need outside help and resources to let the kids benefit the best that they can while in their instructional setting.

Plus, it gives you an up-close, upfront, and personal view of what REALLY does go on in the school environment and classrooms.

This year, I'm looking to add a couple more hats to being a Volunteer. The Principal and I had talked while I was at Orientation with Skyler, who is going in to Kindergarten this year.

We are going to look at me getting a "promotion" to Co-Volunteer-Coordinator, for one thing. The Volunteer Coordinator is dealing with a lot of health issues and having to travel much due to a family member being ill. She was gone a good portion of last school year, and I took over. So, I know what the entire job entails. And I gladly welcome the challenge.

And then, I will be sitting on not just one, but two Parent Advisory Boards. One for the school it's self, and the other where parents from ALL of the schools in each school zone come together and state (as a representative of your school and your zone/ward)in front of the School Board what WE as parents, and as reps, would like to see done differently, added, or taken away from 'policy'.

At the school-level, I would bring back to the meetings, what was discussed and decided upon at the School Board level, we would let the Principal know what we want to see for our individual school, and we would help decide on certain things of what to change, add, or remove.

So, it seems that overall, I'm going to be a busy bee where school is concerned, more so than last year. And I do plan on doing my three-days-per-week volunteering in the classrooms and wherever else I am needed.

I'm honestly at my happiest points after I have done a few hours at the school. It's so very rewarding. Not just for the kids and the staff. But for myself as well. I get to walk away each time, knowing I made a difference in a child's life. Even if it's just a scratch upon the surface.

Once the kids (that don't) get to know me, and I them, there is a very special bond. And yes, I may even collect a few favorites. It's really not hard to do. And the kids that know me from last year will come up and see me. I look forward to those that will do so, to come running up to me and give me my 'daily' hug. I'll be asked if I could lunch with one here or there. And knowing me, I won't be able to resist the puppy dog eyes and cave in.

Really, when I think of it, I don't know who gets more out of volunteering. Us, the Volunteers, or the kids that come to know us and look for us to be darting down the halls, maybe to their classrooms.

Please, if you have never done so, or think you cannot, do try to volunteer at least once within a local school. It's a gift that keeps on giving every time you do something to make a difference in a child's world. I wouldn't trade this gift in for anything.

Cell Phones In School. Should The Ban Be Lifted?

I think for today's post, being that it is nearing that time of the year once more, I shall touch on a subject that could become a hot button topic of debate.

Cell phone usage in schools by students.

Our city school system is thinking of lifting the ban on students from carrying cell phones on their person, while on the school's grounds.

Read about LIFTING BAN ON CELLS here.

Personally, I think that the ban SHOULD be lifted. Superintendent, Dr. McKendrick is correct, as is Heritage High's Principal. There are too many students in today's world that carry cell phones. And it can be quite time consuming to pull each offender in to the Principal's office and confiscate the phones. They average 15 to 20 per day!

Time could be much more well-spent on other areas of running the schools. Like on bullying, creating a positive learning environment, and ensuring everyone's safety. As well as ensuring that the students are getting everything that they can from their classes.

Personally, I have no problems with High School, or even Middle (Junior) High School students carrying cell phones on their person. As long as the usage is before school starts, during lunch break, and after school's last bell rings.

If the student is caught using the phone (via texting or talking) while switching classes, during class, or any other time not deemed appropriate (say during a field trip), then confiscate the item until after school for the remainder of that day.

Then, if a secondary offense occurs with the phone, then confiscate to the parent. If a third offense with the phone happens, then I feel that the school has a right to confiscate and keep the phone until the end of the school year.

We live in a high-tech age more so now than ever before. Our children are using things that were mere dreams when our parents, and even we were growing up in our generation.

Computers for the home didn't even come out until the 1980's. Then, came the message recorder for phones, cordless phones, CD Players, and then, in the early to mid 1990's, finally came the first cell phone. And that has gotten smaller, sleeker, and more 'hide-able' since it's inception in to our world of communication options.

So, with that said, what are YOUR thoughts about kids in High School (or even Middle School) carrying Cell Phones in their backpacks, along with their books and pencils? Yay or nay? Why so?

Pouring Your Heart Out w/Shell...Back To School Time.

Do you need to pour your heart out about something? Then click on the button above to Shell's post at Things I Can't Say, grab a button to put on your PYHO post, and begin pouring.


Please be mindful that everyone linking to Shell's PYHO post is pouring their hearts out and we should all be respectful in our comments. ;)


In our school, they teach (elementary level) Pre-K, through 5th. Last year was THE day for my youngest. She was almost 5 then (will be 6 in a few months). I, like many, counted down the days, made everything sound right in the world to her in regards to going to "big kid" school. And I made it like it was block-party time because Miss Skyler was *GOING TO SCHOOL!*.

When the day was FINALLY here, we got her in her uniform (yes, we are a uniform school..blech!), her big sissy and bro-bro helped her pack her back pack and then all of us (incl. dad who went in late to see this) waited for the inevitable. The first bus ride "alone" as a fully independent child. Not the dependent baby I raised to get to this stage of life.

As we stood there, I had flashbacks of all three kids run through my head. Of when they were babies and toddlers. And then I saw before my eyes, the wonderful children that they (at this point in their lives) have thus far grown up to be.


Sure, I smiled, laughed, made it all-out exciting and positive. But I was dying a little inside. It hurt to see my last baby go off. And seeing Skyler get on that bus did me in. Yes, I kept that slapped-on smile upon my face, and I waved to her as they started to pull off. But, as soon as they were out of eyesight, I lost it.

No longer could I hold back the hurt that my heart felt. The tears in their dam were no longer able to be kept at bay. Reality hit me square in the face, and in the heart.

Walking back in to the house, it was eerily quiet. I was so used to hearing Nick Jr. on the television and seeing Skyler munching on a morning goody (cereal mainly).

But on that day, it was just me and the cats. No "Mama!! I'm thirsty.", or "Mama! Where we go today?". Because, she was at "big kid" school.

This year, it will be a bit better. And Skyler is SO very excited to be going back to school. So is Bryce. Hayley on the other hand? She is 50/50 on the subject.

I get to do this again NEXT year with my oldest, who will be in Middle/Junior High School. It will (I'm sure) be riddled with many of the same fears as I had with them going off to Kindergarten (or Pre-K in Skyler's case) for the first time. Only this time, with MUCH more peer pressure and other "really big kid" things.

Even now, I can see Hayley (and yes, Bryce, too) as they were in the days of where Skyler is now. And all I can wonder at this point is...

God, where does the time fly off to? It all happens so quickly.

It's (almost) that time again!!

I can see it in my head.

They get dressed in their khaki pants, polo shirts and their new school shoes. Bags are all packed and ready to go. A filling breakfast to boot (before dressing, of course).

But, alas, I have a month to go. That's okay. I can somehow wait. I've gone this long. But it will be SO nice sending them off to school once more.

The only part I don't like is that there is the fact of knowing that this is Hayley's last year in Elementary School. Here in Virginia, you go in to Middle (Jr. High) School at the Sixth Grade mark. And for me, that's a HARD pill, to swallow. Knowing that at this time next year, my "baby" will be in with the "big kid" crowd.

In the coming weeks, I will start shopping for them. Hitting the sales. Like the 24-count Crayola Crayons for twenty-five cents a box! And all three kids need them.

And for being in the Fifth Grade this year, Hayley is the CHEAPEST (between the older two, who are one grade apart) to buy for, surprisingly. Bryce (knowing from last year) will be the most expensive. And with Skyler, I might get away with being the cheapest of all three.

Please, don't get me wrong. I love my kids. I love being with them. And I certainly love doing things with them. But my patience and my sanity are waring thin. As is theirs with one another and with me. I've done what I can to keep them active and have fun. I plan on us all going next month, before school starts, up to the Blue Ridge Parkway and take a day for hiking and a picnic.

And of course, once everyone is settled in to school, then I will be filling out (once again) the paperwork to volunteer at school between one and three days per week. It gets me out of the house, involved with the school, lets me stay on top of school-related topics/problems and lets me enrich children's lives.

Though, I try hard to not 'work' in any of my kids' classes, if optional. With exception to some light filing and being a Room Parent (if needed).

So, on August 17th, I shall be marching down to the school (that is a five minute walk from my house) and register the kids. Although I had already PRE-REGISTERED Skyler before the 2009-2010 school year let out.

Then, on August 23rd, starts a brand new school year. And as much as I want them to get on that bus, I can guarantee that it may be a bit hard to see them go off once more to learn and grow. For that will be the end of another fun-filled Summer and another year of their childhood gone forever.

Special Needs, Special Education, Aides, And Stuff.

As the mother of a Special Needs child that is NOT Neurotypical, I love to educate others (the public at large) on what it's like as a parent, but also for our kids, that have a SILENT Disability.

What is a Silent Disability you ask? Well, to put it in layman's terms, it means that someone has a disability, or a combination of different disabilities that does NOT outwardly show in physical appearance. They may walk and talk just fine. But on he INSIDE, it is a completely different story. The person may have Lupus or Fibromyalgia. Or they have Bipolar or Oppositional Defiance Disorder. And there are MANY upon many other ailments, malady's and illness that seem to not appear to be noticed on the outside of the body.

My son has several mental disorders. They impede and impact his daily living and social skills. And also his eating and sleeping habits. He has very few friends. He has a very difficult time with outward, verbal expression. He has emotional set backs, as well as a decreased maturity level (that is NOT within 'normal' range for a boy his age). For the most part, he looks, walks, and talks just like you and I. But when he displays his "quirks" and has manic episodes, and angers so badly that the devil looks like an angel, then you know something is seriously off with my boy.

Have you ever gotten upset at ANY person that parks in the Handicapped Parking space, only to see them get out and walk in to the store, minus a cane, walker, or scooter. And even without an oxygen tank? Are you more upset that they took that spot from a REAL disabled person? Or that they walk and act "just fine"? Maybe for you, it's both?

I've honestly lost count of how many stares my mother-in-law and I have gotten as we step out the van and WALK to the store's entrance from her handicapped parking space. She is disabled and cannot stay in the store and walk for too long. And she has a hard time breathing, but not needing oxygen (yet). She has Systemic Lupus, a colostomy bag and she tires easily due to the Lupus. But you cannot see that from just looking at her.

Now, back to children with Special Needs (of any kind, really). I was reading on my local news station's web page that a near-by county is CUTTING Behavioral Aides from their schools. Why? They suddenly became a part of the county's budget cuts.

http://www.wset.com/news/stories/0610/746253.html?ref=tw

Those that work with kids like mine are an integral part of those student's having the ability, focus and willingness to learn, and learn effectively. To take them away from those kids (as was said in the article) for even just ONE school year, can set those kids (potentially) back for SEVERAL years to come.

I'm sorry, but no basic Teacher's Aide will be able to 'effectively' assist those children in the manner that they need the help to be within the mainstream classroom setting. Not unless they too have children that have some type of mental/behavioral disability/disorder.

Even then, for as long as I have been dealing with and learning the ropes with my own child, it does NOT make me an "expert" in the field of Childhood Neurological Behavioral Sciences. I'm just a MOM that has a lot of personal experience and literature-based knowledge of what is wrong with MY child.

Many, if not MOST of those children have SSI Disability, as well as Medicaid Insurance. If need be, the kids can still have their Aides (those that will require the most one-on-one assistance), and Medicaid can pick up the bills. All they will need is a Pre-Authorization from their Specialist. Ninety-nine percent of the time, Pre-Auth's are APPROVED.

In the end, it's truly a win-win situation. No money out of the school's pocket (or the children's parents). And the kids get the Aides that they desperately need in order to receive the best education possible for their abilities (and disabilities).

Honestly, this is a 'no-brainer'....

Organ/Tissue Donation....Distorting the MYTHS. Stating the FACTS.

Organ Donation. It is one of the most selfless, heroic acts a person can do for their fellow man. It gives another person (or a number of people) a new lease on life. A second chance that would not have come otherwise.

Since it's founding and inception, Organ, Tissue, and Eye Donation have made great strides, and had come a long way where medical technology is concerned.

Too bad public education and awareness have neither made the same wonderful strides since that time. There are so many myths, half truths and all-out lies when it comes to the topic of Organ/Tissue/Eye Donation. Some are classics that you have heard so many times, it's like second nature and doesn't even phase you when you hear the words blurted out unexpectedly.

The number one myth/lie I tend to hear the most is... "If I have an accident or other tragic medical emergency, and I am a Registered Organ Donor, then the EMS and the Emergency Department/hospital will NOT do EVERYTHING in their power to save my life, so that they can get my organs".

How very, VERY untrue that this statement is. All medical professionals are to do EVERYTHING in their means and within their power to save lives. No matter if the patient is an organ donor, or not. 

Another is.. "They might take my 'parts' when I am still legally alive, but look like I am dead".

Yet, this is another false statement. The Transplant Coordination Team must do various, and rigorous tests, including several EEG's, eye dilation test, and nerve sensation testing. After all of those are completed (multiple times) and each time nothing changes with negative results for EVERY time, then the patient is declared BRAIN DEAD (which is a legal form of death), and also their only means of having a heartbeat and breathing lungs is via the ventilator.

There were comments on a Fan Page I belong in regards to the possibility of New York mandating an "Opt-Out" Organ Donation System, where you are of "presumed consent to donate", unless you sign a paper/check a box for your State-issued Driver's License or ID that you wish to NOT be an Organ Donor. Basically, it is donation in reverse. Instead of VOLUNTARILY giving your organs, you will be PRESUMED to be a donor, unless you say otherwise.

Some of the comments were either of a selfish nature, or of not enough self-education in to the ins and outs of donating.

There are some people that don't want to donate being that they would only want to have their "parts" go to 'good people', not "killers, rapists" and others deemed less fitting of society.

There was one comment where an ADULT female would only donate (including her heart) ONLY to children. Sadly to say though, an adult (for the most part) cannot donate their organs to a child. Especially the heart and the lungs.

The only adult organs that are able to be cross-matched with children (TO MY KNOWLEDGE) is heart valves, and the liver (that can be cut in to 7 or 8 pieces and will regenerate to full size in the host body), skin, and the corneas (window of the eye).

Otherwise, there is no feasible ability to transplant adult organs in to children. Not unless the recipient's chest wall, kidney areas are of a compatible size of their donors.

In all real honesty, the last two excuses/explanations I gave as to why people wish to NOT donate their organs after their death are the two most selfish. Yes, children (especially infants and other small children) are at the greatest need of transplants. And they have the highest rate of donor shortage. But I do NOT fault the parents of deceased children. It is hard enough to lose your child, only to have to make a DRASTIC decision like that, at such a critical, emotional and bereaved time such as that.

But unlike the latter, I don't see where, in my mind and personal opinion, that there is a valid excuse to NOT donate (other than for religious practice/belief reasons). Especially when you put a "price" on donating. Such as stipulating that you only want a "good person or people" to have your organs. Or that as an adult only wants to give to children, which will make what you CAN give, very little.

Speaking of "setting a price" on Organ Donation. That is another misconception I caught on that Fan Page board. Some one (who rides motorcycles) said that he wouldn't want to donate, being that the DONOR family gets dumped with the cost of procurement, transporting of the organs and tissues, and for the RECIPIENT's  surger(ies).

Again, a FALSE statement/myth/accusation. Nothing, and I mean *NOTHING* is charged to the Donor or their family for *any* part of the Transplant process. That all befalls to the RECIPIENT. Believe me, I know. Just for my cornea (not including harvesting, transportation, or transplantation) cost me $3,000.00. ME!....Not my donor or their family. It is against FEDERAL law to charge a single dime to the Donor or their loved ones being a donor or for the donation process.

So, I hope that for those of you that are still deciding to become an Organ/Tissue Donor, or for those of you that never really knew much about the process have read this and have taken something away (positive) about the TRUTH of being a Donor.

I truly believe that if more people were to self-educate (through reputable organizations, websites and through personal experiences of recipients) of exactly how Donation works, there would be MILLIONS more people willing to sign up to be a HERO.

CDC, recalls, and kids. When did we as a society stop REALLY living?

I would be the first to admit it to you. I have not lead the most pristene, clean, upstanding, "perfect" life in this old world of ours. I have screwed up COUNTLESS time in my thirty-three years of living on this rocky, round land.

And for the most part, I live it without regret. And (again for the most part) I don't try to look back. Only ahead. What more can a person really and honestly do?

Over on Facebook, I belong to a Fan Page for the local news channel that I used to watch when I lived in Nevada (http://www.facebook.com/pages/Reno-NV/KOLO-8-News-Now/39225221502). One of today's topics is in regards to the McDonald's 'Shrek'-themed glasses being recalled, due to SUPPOSEDLY having too much Cadmium.

Can someone please tell me when the CDC, the Federal Government, Congress and other branches of Legislation forced kids to stop from being KIDS?

Because when I was little, I had the glasses that were sold/passed out with my Happy Meals of the Disney characters. I had drank water from my parent's garden hose. I ate glue. Hell, I even tried to eat a worm once, as I pretended that it was a piece of 'spaghetti'. I skated and rode my bike without a helmet and knee pads (which I DO wish we DID have back then). I even ate Silly Putty and took big old whiffs of the stuff (because it oddly smelled good to me).

What's the whole point of the list above? To show that as a child I LIVED. I had FUN. And guess what? I came out no worse for ware. I'm alive and kicking. I felt the JOY, as well as the FUN, and the RUSH of being uninhibited and LIVING.

Today, it's all about mass recalls, don't drink the tap water, don't eat non-organic foods, that Soy milk will be healthier than Cow's milk.

So tell me, when did we stop living? Kids today are so tied down with Nintendo, Internet, crappy T.V. shows (that are WAAAAY more volatile in nature, then back in my day). They are no longer going outside in the yard to play.

This is why I *make* my kids play outside every chance I can get. They are limited on T.V., computer and Nintendo time. They have to play or be reading for the majority of the day.

Yes, my kids do get *most* of the CDC recommended shots. I have only said no to one or two types that I will flat-out refuse to let ANY of them have. But other than that, I let my kids enjoy life like I did back when I was a child.

They drink from the water hose outside. They play in the dirt and mud. They dig up worms and on occasion have made mud pies with the worms as "topping". And they do MANY other things that I did as a kid, growing up. Because I let them LIVE, as well as ENJOY their childhood, while they have the chance.

My mom died at the age of 43 from complications of a massive Stroke. She (had) and my father have Type 2 Diabetes. There is heart disease in my family. I have been a life-long asthmatic, due to BIRTH-RELATED complications/birth defects. I was to NOT be alive after the first 24-48 hours after my birth. I had to LIVE in the hospitals for (almost) the first 3 years of my life. I am a recent Corneal Transplant Recipient. How much more 'first-hand experience' am I supposed to have?

So, for the CDC to recall things left and right for practically EVERY single thing is getting (in MY opinion) highly ridiculous and asinine. Especially with it being primarily all CHILDREN'S toys, clothing and food geared towards kids. And because of CDC's warnings, recalls, (constantly) 'updated' warnings to the AMA Boards, kids have been BANNED (yes, I said 'banned') from being typical children.

I feel sorry for my children, and for the world's children of today, and will continue to do so for the future generations, including (God willing) grandchildren. They are, and will be tied down by so many "what if's", 'recalls', warnings and Government-geared 'scare tactics', that we may as well just let the world blow up right now or all commit suicide. Because we can't let people LIVE and better yet, not ENJOY life. There are too many bad POSSIBILITIES out there that might kill us.

Like I stated on the KOLO News page to a fellow commentator, no one ever said ANY of us were going to live perfectly. But LIVE it (life), because it's the only one you have.

My Shining Star (My Son)

Well, yet another chapter has been written for my child. Another diagnosis. Another medication. And I'm okay with it. We know what it is, what it's caused by and how long he could have the problem.

Finally, after almost a month of fighting and nipping the heels of the doctor's office staff manager, the insurance company and making some complaints filed, it happened. Bryce FINALLY got his prescription for the Intuniv approved to be covered by his insurance carrier. That's one less thing to worry about.

As for his oral tics, they have gotten worse. And we noted that they picked up more after the Intuniv was started. Although, we pinpointed that it is NOT the medication causing them. But the medications (one, two, or possibly all three) are bringing them out more than they would usually show.

Bryce has now been diagnosed with Tardive Diskinesia. Basically, his tics are a neurological disorder consisting of abnormal, involuntary body movements caused by certain medicines. It is usually associated with long-term use of medicines for treating schizophrenia and other psychotic disorders. And this disorder will most likely NEVER go away. He has a strong possibility of always having tics to some degree for the rest of his life. And some bouts can and do affect his day-to-day living.

By what we have seen, as early as infancy, he has always had a very mild case of tics. But since starting certain medicines (primarily the Seroquel and the Intuniv that was just added), the tics have become more prominent and vary in degree of progression and regression. They have once again gotten not only in to his mouth region, but also in his hands and feet. Even his eyebrows are getting the tics.

We as his parents, have seen great improvement in everything thanks to the Intuniv being added. He isn't as aggressive, or volatile. He has a better time focusing and being organized. Even his teachers had stated how improved he had been (they did NOT know I placed him on the Intuniv for the first 2 or so weeks). They said he was like day and night with the (positive) changes.

Of course, those changes came with a price. But it's one that all of us (myself, my husband Scott, and Bryce himself) are willing to pay. And that is the severe increase in the tic disorder. I'm calling him my Jumping Jellybean. 

My son, no matter his outward appearance is still a NORMAL, active, (for the most part) healthy boy. He just has A LOT of twitches. And yes, it can impact his speech and verbalizing things he wants to say. It takes him a bit longer to get his sentences out. Patience is the key. For both of us.

In fact, this year, Bryce (for the first time) is taking the Standards Of Learning Tests (math, reading, science, social studies). He has a "Test-Taking Buddy", where he goes off to the teacher's room that does Title-One reading to do his testing. He finds it better to be alone so he can talk-think his answers, doesn't feel as pressured to perform well, and isn't on a time limit (being he is disabled, those are his afforded rights as a disabled student). His scores will come in the mail with his final report card of the 2009-2010 school year.

He may not "look" normal, but he isn't your "average" kid either. He may be at about a 4 to 6-year-old mental-maturity level, but he has been deemed (like his older sister) to be Academically Gifted. He can do work from normal grade (3rd) range, up to 6th-grade-level, based on the subject.

I'm proud of all three of my kids. They are all my shining stars in one way or another. But Bryce's star shines just a tad brighter. He has endured one struggle after another in stride, and with pride. And he has (in his own unique way) shown this old mama just how strong and how far she will go to see that my kids are NEVER 'left behind'. And for that, I will forever be in his debt and he will always have my gratitude.

My First Time.

Some say, when you have your first time, it can be really scary. You don't know what to expect, how to act or react. Or even what to feel at that very moment in time.

There are many firsts in our lives. First boyfriend or girlfriend. First dates and kisses. First time having sex. And then there is another first. One that thousands in the United States, and millions world wide get to have. Believe me, it is a first that no one wants to experience.

The loss of someone that for some people, they don't really even know on a "personal" level. But the shock, hurt, fear, and pain is still the same. Because in my exclusive club, when one hurts, we all hurt. When one rejoices, we all rejoice.

Sadly, there is no rejoicing for us in the Transplant Community in our Facebook tight-knit group, TEC. For one of our own is watching his wife dying before his very eyes. And there is NOTHING now that can be done for her.

She was in the process of testing to receive a Liver Transplant. She was even transferred to another hospital to start rehabilitation. But no sooner they got her there, she had to go back to her regular hospital and be placed in ICU. Sadly, she is now in Liver and Renal Failure. Her Kidneys have also basically shut down. Now, this vibrant, "young" woman is on full life support and around-the-clock dialysis.

Her family is coming in to say their good-bye's and at this point she is comfortable. By Monday, she will be taken off of life support and let nature take it's course, unless her heart stops before then.

This is a first for me. It is a stark, let alone grim reality of being in the Transplant World. None of us, be it Live Donors, Donor Families, or Recipients, I think honestly "get it" until something like this happens. We are in a "La La Land" of sorts. We all know that some get the call and are lucky. Some sadly don't. But until it REALLY "hits home" and happens to one of your own (so to speak), you can't honestly get a grasp on the severity of the realities of being in this (be it unwanted) exclusive club, where ALL ages are welcome, nor are they turned away. Transplantation has no age limits. Nor does Organ Failure.

Today, I await word on a friend's wife. He held out so much hope, gave her SO much love and devotion and was there for her from beginning to end, never wavering. He was giving positivity and hope to fellow new caregivers, even as he has had been getting his own heart shattering through seeing that there was nothing he could do but support and be there for the love of his life. And he is at this moment, by her side. Showing her his undying love, giving all the support he can as her soul-mate and just waiting for the end to sadly come.

We, his friends, have been loving them, supporting them and have hoped for the best. But sadly, the best came too late in the game. And for one woman, her journey through the Transplant Experience is almost over. Help was coming too late.

This "first" is something I will carry with me for years to come. And it's a "first" I knew would come along in my life. I just didn't think I would be blind sided with it this soon after becoming a Recipient myself. But I thank it for coming like it did. Why? Because now I can see the TRUE realities of the Transplant Community/World. It's not all a bed of sunshine, puppies and rainbows.

There is also darkness, heart break, sadness and death. In  this "club", lives are at stake. We have to depend on another person, be it that they are alive or have died, to keep US alive, seeing and going on with our own lives. And to be here for our loved ones. That's a hard pill to have to swallow.

Some one had to DIE to give me my sight back. Some people depended on someone's death to be their second chance for a new heart or a new set of lungs. It's not easy knowing this fact. In some ways, some of us (myself included) felt like we "took" or "stolen" from our donors, in a selfish manner. But that is NOT the case.

Our donors gave of themselves to help those that are in need of a second chance at living their lives and being with their loved ones. Without them, we either would not be able to see, walk or even be alive ourselves.

There is so much more of a Demand, than there is a Supply for people in need of a Transplant. Be it a heart, a kidney, lungs, cornea, skin, and many other organs, tissues and even blood. Please, if you have yet to do so, SIGN UP to be an Organ/Eye/Tissue Donor. Be a HERO and pay it forward. You never know when YOU may depend on someone else for a second chance for the Gift of Life.

Hate-induced group has NO place on Facebook! (link incl)

President Barrack Hussein Obama. He was voted in to the White House by voters that happened to get the majority. He is half black, half white. He was whom I voted for.

Today, am I pleased with ALL of his policies and Federal Spending? Nope! But I also realize that the poor guy has one hell of a mess to clean up after what all transpired the previous eight years.

I'm mad with Pres. Obama for a couple of things. Like any other politician, he back slid on his promises. But this time, I was too gullible to not see the forest for the trees.

But do I wish and/or pray for our President to DIE?! Either by God's hand or a fellow human beings...No!

Sadly though, there IS a Facebook group/page that IS doing just that. And at this point in time, they have OVER ONE MILLION "fans". Some are even sick enough to cheer on in the group that they HOPE someone will soon be sure that their prayer is answered.

Those that think it's funny to be a part of a "prayer page" titled "DEAR LORD, THIS YEAR YOU TOOK MY FAVORITE ACTOR, PATRICK SWAYZIE. YOU TOOK MY FAVORITE ACTRESS, FARA...H FAWCETT. YOU TOOK MY FAVORITE SINGER, MICHAEL JACKSON. I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW, MY FAVORITE PRESIDENT IS BARACK OBAMA. AMEN  " , guess what? IT'S NOT FUNNY!

Honestly, go LOOK deeply in to that hate-filled, volatile group. Read what "supposed Christians" are saying. Look at those disturbing pictures. Read their Discussions. Then, take a GOOD LOOK at yourself, your friends, your family...and most of all, your country.


This is NOT what America was founded upon, or to stand for!

Joking even about wanting the POTUS dead is considered a FEDERAL Offense, as well as a Felony. Praying for the man's demise is SICK, as well as VERY anti-Christian. The Bible speaks of praying FOR our leaders. Not AGAINST them, or to wish them ill-will.

The POTUS is not only a National Leader. But a father and a husband. Take out his name, and replace it with yours, your child's or your husband's name. Does it sound funny to you anymore? I bet you not!

Oh, and the Constitution does NOT protect ANY form of hate speech. Joking or serious. And it is not considered "Freedom of Speech" to invoke others to incite violence, especially against National Leaders. 

Saying that the President is an asshole and his policies suck is one thing. THAT IS protected by your Constitutional Rights to Free Speech. But that is far as it can go.


Just like yelling "FIRE!" in a public place when there is no fire, just out of joking, is considered a felony and NOT protected by your rights to Free Speech. So yes Virginia, there IS a limitation to so-called "Free Speech". 


The United States has become exactly like a house divided. And the way we are going in these two directions, a second Civil War is looming. I can see it coming from a mile away. Is this REALLY what "we the people" want?! A SECOND Civil War?


As for the self-proclaimed Christians of that horrendous page, I myself PERSONALLY do NOT see them as "Christians". If they were REAL Christians, they would NOT think it was funny. They would NOT stand for a "prayer" such as that. They would NOT be praying in REAL life for ANYONE's life to be snuffed out for things especially as trivial as policy decisions.


Like or dislike President Obama. Like or dislike his policies. Like or dislike his race even. But do NOT ever even jokingly wish/hope for his demise in the manner of DEATH.