Putting My Worst Face Foward...

I didn't always see myself as "pretty". In honestly any sense of the word.

I was your average American tomboy girl. I loved being barefoot, in jeans or shorts and a comfy shirt. I hated dresses and makeup. In fact, I rarely, if ever wear either of the latter to this day. And I'm about to turn thirty-five.

As a teen, I had your basic teen acne. Or so I'd thought. I had some pretty icky breakouts. Especially around the time of a hormonal flux at the nearing of my menstrual cycle.

After years of trying everything, by my 19th birthday, it all just went away. I went on with my life. Had gotten married, had a child, divorced. Remarried, had two more children. Also I'd lost a child in between the middle and youngest.

That's also when my breakouts came back. Right near the loss of that baby in 2003. And they came back with a vengeance.

After having my youngest child, who is now seven years old, and in the First Grade, things only had become worse. But I figured that over time, with my hormones getting back to a normal level, everything would just clear up again.

Oh how WRONG was I with that assumption. If anything, they had become worse.

By the time she was a year old, my face went to looking like this with Rosacea...

And yes, it steadily got worse than this. To the point that it hurt me emotionally, psychologically and even socially.

I hated leaving my home. I didn't like to be out in public. Not looking like that! People would stare. Little children would ask what happened to my face, as they pointed and had that look of disgust upon their faces.

There were times that I was even embarrassed to be around my family, wondering what they thought of how I looked. On occasion certain members of the family would "grill" me on what I ate, what I used to clean my face and whatnot.

I did NOTHING wrong. I ate NOTHING wrong. It was NOT my fault. But it certainly felt like I did SOMETHING wrong.

Eventually the Rosacea went in to an area of the body I had NEVER heard of it even being possible.

My eyes. But it primarily attacked my left eyeball. And I went to a Ophthalmologist who sadly MISTREATED me for the wrong infection. In the end, the Ocular Rosacea (Subtype 4) ate away most of the cornea (outer window of the pupil that is your eye's lens) in the left eye.

At times, my face looked like this man's...

And yes, my eye would like like the one in this picture...

In the end, after my cornea had perforated (had a hole in it), I looked like this..

Not even two weeks later, thanks to Ocular Rosacea eating away my cornea, I had no choice but to have an emergency-based Corneal Transplant (Keratoplasty) and required a full graft of another person's cornea after they had died and were an organ/tissue donor.

Here I am 2-weeks post-op...

And here I am 2 YEARS later...

As for the Rosacea, it is now under control!! I am on Doxycycline pills. And will most likely be on and off of them for the rest of my life.

Plus, soon, seeing as I can no longer have children, we are going to try a cream medication after removing me from the Doxycycline pills in a few months. And if need be, I may even end up being on both to ensure that when I have an "attack of the pimple kind", it will not be that bad, and will be staved off from being inside my eye.

Here I am today, pimple/Rosacea free (for the most part)...

I still have breakouts. Mainly around my cycle. But it's now just a bump here and a bump there. Yes, they CAN be painful, swelled and very red. But at least I'm NOWHERE near as horrible looking as back in the time of my youngest being a baby.

I'm more confident, knowledgeable about my conditions and am no longer afraid to walk out of my home, only to face ridicule from strangers young and old.

Time Has Passed & It's Almost Time Again.. (Picture-filled post!)

Now you are probably sitting here, reading that title and wondering, "what in the world is this chick talking about with this wacky riddle?!".

On November 18th, my oldest of the three kids had turned twelve years old. Yes, she is one more year closer to the dreaded tag known as "teenager". All in all though, with her maturity level (both mentally, as well as physically) she is more like a fourteen year old.

I'm thirty-five. She is twelve. I am 100 pounds on the nose. She last weighed in at 98. I am five feet tall. She is too. I don't have a set of "boobage". She does.

Basically, if you were to ask her thoughts about all this "you're as tall as your Mama" talk, that may just be what she would do to me after snickering. Like she did in the doctor's office when he asked how old I was, when discussing reading glasses.

As for the second part of the answer to my awesome riddle-title...

The youngest of the three "angels" of mine will be turning seven years old on Monday. Hard to believe. Already, seven years have just up and flown past like a speeding NASCAR racer doing 250 on the inside stretch.

In many ways she is taking after her big sister. She looks up to her (especially being that Big Sissy is about a foot and a half or so taller than her lol) and severely misses her when my oldest has to go on bi-weekly visits with her biological father.

Both of my girls have shown me (albeit the hard way) just what all it had taken my parents to raise me. Raging hormones, attitudes, "Princess-tude".

And thank God, the oldest (who now wears makeup), puts it on and still looks natural, but accentuates her features. Especially those beautiful blue eyes of her's.

At the end of the day, no matter how old they get, and no matter how tall they grow, they will ALWAYS be the apple of their Daddy's eye. My husband may not be my oldest's biological father with not a shred of DNA shared between them, but she is HIS, and he will tell you that to your face.

The little one is so wrapped around her Dad's finger, it's not funny. Okay. It is. But geez! And I thought that I got away with "murder" as a kid. Wrong. I kind of wish I could do that "Freaky Friday" thing and trade places with her for about 24 hours and enjoy some of the (tons of) freedom that she gets.

This past Summer's trip to Richmond has been one of the best I think that we have enjoyed as a family. And now, with all three of my kids growing up, and inching ever so much closer to being teens and "big kids", I find myself reflecting more on the Summers past, when the kids were so innocent, that it never seemed like we as parents would have to deal with more than scraped knees and the occasional "she/he took my toy".

To those of you with "young" (as in under the age of eight years old), take my advice and heed it well. Cherish EVERY single moment with your child(ren). Relish in each hug and kiss (yes, even the open-mouthed baby ones!). Enjoy the fanciness of every tea party and doll playtime.

The young years fly by faster than a Santa Ana wind.

Picture Perfect w/For The Love of Blogs

(Taken last month (July,2011) at a theme park. Times like this, we cherish when all three can be TRUE brother and sisters, being that due to my son's mental issues, they don't always have the best relationship among themselves.)

It's the Final Countdown!!

As of today, only three weeks left. Then it's BACK TO SCHOOL!!!! And this being August first, the song (and aptly the title of this post) came rushing to mind. And it's been in my head since then.



We (as in Dad and I) are in the homestretch. Been a long, hot, but fun summer overall. But I will indeed be happy that they are going to be in school soon. The kids miss their friends. They miss the teachers (two do, as the oldest is in Middle School this year).

We had our annual family vacation trek (which may change next year) to Kings Dominion theme park. Here's a few pictures...

We had a blast! But it was pretty hot and muggy. Still, the kids wore us out. Between the rides (including the Shockwave where my oldest caught me and Dad going through the loop, picture above) and the water park the next day, I think the kids nearly killed us this year.

As for Gobi, our Bearded Dragon, he is still growing like a weed.

So, with all that said, the next three weeks will be pretty busy. I still have another child going in for an annual exam, and having to get the Physical forms to let the oldest play sports this year, need to school shop for supplies. Thankfully, my husband's mom has helped me get clothes for ALL THREE kids throughout the summer at the thrift store she volunteers at. Including uniform items for the two younger ones. All I need to buy are some new shoes, clothing-wise. And of course, the oldest and I need to go to Middle School Orientation.

After the school year starts, I'm going to be blogging much more often. But it felt good to take a break from it for the summer (for the most part). Have a great week, and I'll be back soon!

Thought I'd Update

Hello, Readers! Thought I'd pop in for a few moments and let you all know that I am always thinking of you guys and I hope that the Summertime is treating you and your family all well.

Any plans this year? Or have you already taken trips that you decided on?

Well, so far, so good here in my world. Summer days are bit muggy lately, so it makes for awful hot days. My son is enjoying his Day Treatment Camp time (goes Monday through Thursday, during the day, only).

My oldest who is going in to Middle School this Fall has made ALL Advanced courses, and was accepted/invited to attend a "gifted program" school for her grade range, where they have science labs such as a Lazerarium, Terrariums with different exotic pets (including an iguana and a couple of bearded dragons) and a "hands on" petting fish tank.

My youngest is starting first grade and is pretty apprehensive. But I know she will adjust quickly once she really gets to know her teacher (who is a LOVELY lady who LOVES her job and her students).

Here's a few pictures of some recent past adventures of Summer... And of how big our Bearded Dragon, Gobi is getting since I last posted about him.

Well, soon, we will have LOTS more pictures coming, thanks to our annual trek to King's Dominion coming up. Talk to you all again soon. I can't wait to be back on here more regularly. I'm still on my "hiatus", but wanted to let you all know that I'm still alive and am enjoying myself. Have a great rest of the Summer and I'll "read" you all again very soon.

My baby Graduated!...And she isn't even in High School yet. (=

On Friday, we had our last day of school for the Summer. We here in the city were on the College schedule and had almost a month-long Winter Break, a shorter Spring Break, got out of school twenty minutes later than last year. To say it was effed up is an understatement.

First off, I am happy to report that Hayley made a perfect 600 on her Math SOL. She also made advanced score on Science, and "proficient" on Reading (though she is an average of a level 10th grade reading level, but was one question shy of "advanced" on the test..big whoop, right?). Social Studies score will be mailed, seeing as they took it late and the results took longer than we had.

It was SUCH a busy week where school was concerned. Friday was the "pay off" day for about sixty or so fifth graders in our school. They made it. EVERY SINGLE ONE. We have a 100% Graduation/Advancement Rate going on to the area's Middle Schools in the Fall.

In their honor, they and their parents and other selected (by the students) family members were treated to a Graduation Breakfast, by a fellow mom who's daughter is also moving on to Middle School.

Our Guest Speaker was Lynchburg City Mayor, Joan Foster. Her last, and most profound sentence to the kids were, "Follow YOUR vision and let no one negative get in the way of your dreams".

          (Mayor Foster speaking to the kids..and to us parents, who got a round of applause, too.)

           (Mayor Foster with Hayley (in red) and her close BFF who will be in a different school.)

              (Hayley with her BFF in green and homeroom 5th grade teacher, along with her other good friend.)

              (Her Science and Social Studies Teacher, whom she ADORED (not saying she didn't love HR Teacher, too! lol))

Osama bin Laden's "death picture"

Normally, I don't put out more than one post per blog, per day. But today is a bit different. Because there has been a major change in the course of our history. Not only in my country, the United States of America, but globally.

The reign of terror known as Osama bin Laden is OVER. At least where the man himself is concerned. Now, we should plan our next move to abolish the entire al Qaeda group, in my opinion.

In the wake of his death, people have been making so-called rallying cries as for being furnished the "proof" that the Devil's next of kin is really, honestly, most in fact D-E-A-D.

Well, I'm just going to come out and say it...

People that are demanding a picture of a dead bin Laden are NUTS! And they are not thinking of what COULD happen if those photos are released.

Plus, I do NOT want my SMALL children to be given the chance to see an extremely graphic picture of a man with holes through his skull.

I'm reading the article via CNN's news site about the "debate" to release OBL's death pictures. CLICK HERE TO READ FOR YOURSELF.

The following picture below IS graphic, but is also a *FAKE*. Be warned though, it's not pretty, and it makes me queasy.

Now, just think, if you think this one, which indeed IS Photo-Shopped is gross, imagine how much nastier that the REAL pictures will be.

In fact, here is a quote from Collin Powell, via the said article on his thoughts regarding the releasing of the REAL post-mortem pictures of the right-hand man of the Devil himself.

"Powell said he doubts releasing an image will satisfy doubters.

"There will be skeptics out there as you know whether in the Middle East (or elsewhere)," Powell said. "Even if you show the picture, there'll be skeptics. That's just the nature of the world. Because they'll say it was Photoshopped.""

Boy, oh boy! I agree 1,000% with the man and have in fact said the VERY exact same thing. No matter what, the skeptics and anyone against Obama will cry and say that they are faked and are just showing them to shut the doubters up.

In other words, the President and his Administration can't win, no matter what road that they decide to take. No matter WHATEVER TYPE of proof is laid out for all to see. Plus it could have GRAVE ramifications for us as a nation if we were to plaster the dead man's pictures all over the nightly news cast, and our "celebration" of such means were to reach the Middle East. Talk about seeking vengeance! We would LITERALLY be asking for it.

And I for one believe that Osama bin Laden REALLY is dead and buried (at sea..please don't make me have to explain that to you all, too).

Al Jazeera has confirmed that the al Qaeda leader is in fact dead as a door nail. His followers have been mourning him and are hailing him as a martyr. And they are vowing to avenge the asshole's death.

What more proof do you need?

Because I Have Nothing To Offer...

I say that we find some funny, which will be in pictures. Which will be where some are not for the wee ones to see. So I suggest that you view this post at a later time, or in a place where the kiddies can't get a gander. Because sometimes, we just need to have some ADULT humor.