So This Stay-At-Home-Mom Isn't Perfect...

As a married mother of three kids that stays home as a "Homemaker" (honestly, I never got a Contractor's License so I cannot build homes, but oh well) I am in charge of overseeing all the operations of the home. I'm also a waitress at mealtimes.

I'm a cook (though not a very good one). I'm a maid (also not the best in the world, but I do try, seeing as I DO have THREE kids). I'm an accountant (though I suck at math). I'm a Secretary (who has to jot down names, numbers, and pay the bills and fight with the bank now and then).

I'm the dish washer and the seamstress (that doesn't sew, but can do a mean job of throwing laundry in the washer/dryer and fold it...but not big on putting it away). I'm an Assistant Teacher who helps their kids (the best I can) with their homework (having Advanced/Gifted Student children DOES NOT help).

In between all of that, I am also a wife, a lover, a best friend, a companion to my husband.

Also, I volunteer at the school as much as I can. But also with the Winter setting in, and being that I don't drive, that five-minute walk in severe cold (basically anything under 45 degrees for me) can be costly )financially and health-wise), that soon will take a back seat for a while.

And also, I am to be the Schedule Keeper. I make the appointments, see that we go to the appointments and try my best to juggle appointment times around everyone else's (hubby's work and kids' school) schedules. Last night, I failed. Ooopsies!!

It honestly slipped my mind about Bryce's appointment with his Psychiatrist. He sees him basically monthly for a medicine check and to see how school and family/social life are going, and see what modifications need changing or added.

Thankfully Bryce said that I needed to get Daddy up because he has to see Dr. K (only providing initial for privacy issues) at 5:00. As I looked at the clock, it was 4:23. I sprang in to action and started yelling "SOCKS AND SHOES...NOW!". And I had to scare Scott awake by almost pouncing on him like one of my cats to tell him to get up NOOOOOW.

Just think, it was a smooth-running Monday morning (for once, which is rare) for getting ready for school. Then this old Mom went and wrecked the rest of the afternoon (hence not making home-made tacos) thanks to her brain having a short.

Let this post make you see that while I know (yes, by experience) that being a Working Mom is no cake walk in the park, I can honestly say, being a Stay-At-Home Mom isn't all it's cracked up to be either.

Being a Mother (Or Wife) *Really Is* A 'Thankless' Job!

I honestly DO love being my children's mother. They bring smiles to my face in one way or another, almost on a daily basis.

I've laughed with them. I've cried with them. I've laughed at their actions or words. I've cried for them.

All in all, I would die for them, if need be. I would do almost anything for them. Almost.

When you hear women say that motherhood is a 'thankless' job, they aren't kidding! It truly is a 'thankless' job, indeed. No pay (as in no monetary gain), no vacation (even when you ARE on vacation, away from the kids), no sick days (being you still most of the time, end up caring for them, even when feeling your worst), and no promotion (being that you have the highest job in the "company").

You cook. You clean. You ensure that they have all that they need, basics-wise. You make sure that they are up, ready, and prepared for school each morning. And never once (or so rare, that we often forget it has been said) do you get a "thanks for all that you do, Mom" comment from them.

Lately, I have gotten really tired. Tired of being the (Not Very) Merry Maid around the house. No matter what I threaten my kids with, be it loss of TV or computer time, or any other interests that I can take away, it doesn't seem to sink in.

It's a CONSTANT battle to get, let alone KEEP the house (especially their rooms and the play/family room) decently clean for more than twenty-four hours at a time. And instead of THEM HELPING to clean up around the house (mainly their own messes), I end up having to. Or else I have "consequences" to pay. Such as hearing my husband bitch and moan.

In fact, I also have to clean up after him. It's little things. But even then, I feel it is a bit...hypocritical of him to get on the kids about not cleaning up after themselves, but he leaves band-aid wrappers laying around, or a glass on the table.

It must be nice to go to your job, work your ass off, and when you do something that is "above and beyond", you get a compliment. Praise is a nice "payment" or "reward" for a job well done.

Sadly though, many a mother and/or wife that stays home all day doesn't hear those simple, few words that can and does make her day. What are they, you ask?

"The house looks really good. You did a good job".

Honestly, how hard IS this for any man to say? Must be almost impossible. I get "dumped on" with his daily work happenings. I also get told of the GOOD points of his day as well. The same with the kids.

The minute I try to talk about my "roses and thorns" though, I get deaf ears and practically ignored. Or at times even told "I don't want to hear it"...Nice, huh?

I know for a fact, that I am far from being the ONLY wife/mother with these thoughts, and these "situations". But just once in a while, I want to be seen as more than that. I want more than JUST the respect of being 'just' a wife to my husband, and 'just' the mother to my children.

For so many years, I have been struggling to keep MY identity. My pre-wife and my pre-motherhood identities. Thus far, I think I have failed in still trying to be the ME that I was before husbands and kids. I know that I am more than these two things. But apparently, I am not viewed in any other manner. At least not in my own home.

This may be far from the truth. I'm sure that my husband would tell me otherwise. But then again, 'actions speak louder than words'.

Got a small beef with blog followers (from ANY blog).

Just out of curiosity...

Do you 'drop' a blogger from your list of reading ventures due to their not writing a post basically on a daily basis?

Do you, if you blog, write on your blog page(s) on a daily basis, a few times or once a week? Or do you blog when the mood to moves you?

I'm wondering if a (now former) follower dropped me being that it was almost a week or so between posting blog posts. I don't really care that they did so. But it popped in my head that I must not be writing enough to suit their reading taste.

Well, lets take a really good look at my blog and break it down, shall we?

Look at the name of my blog... 'The (Not Always) Happy Homemaker Diary'. Operative word here? HOMEMAKER. Which means that I am a STAY-AT-HOME wife and mother.

I have one husband and I have THREE kids. And those children (through this weekend) are on SUMMER VACATION from school. Which means three kids that need to have MY attention as needed BEFORE anything else.

Plus if you notice, I have written many times in the past about my son, who is a SPECIAL NEEDS child that requires more attention and time consumption than most 'average' kids.

Plus, I have to take care of the home, hence the HOMEMAKER part of my blog name. Laundry, dishes, vacuuming, sweeping, cleaning out cat boxes (being we have three of them) and any other jobs that need to be done around here.

Now, if you have read the blog entry from YESTERDAY, you will also know that I am gearing up to once again volunteer at my kids' school (hopefully) three days a week, if not more. I'm quite possibly being 'promoted' to Co-Volunteer Coordinator. Which means quite possibly more time at the school, as well as 'working' from home.

Plus I will be on not just one, but two Parent Advisory Boards for not only the school, but for my school's district.

So, when you add all of this together, it makes for MUCH less time typing up blog entries. And if you are looking for daily, or semi-daily bloggers, then I am NOT your girl. Especially with school starting.

Also, I have a secondary blog called ParanorMel that delves in to the realm of the Paranormal. Primarily with ghosts/spirits and hauntings. Even that blog gets posted to, maybe, I'd say once a week to every two weeks. It all depends on if I had a personal experience happen, if there is a topic in my head that I wish to cover, or if I found a video and/or article that I found interesting enough to share.

But also, I do NOT see my followers dropping me there. And they know I WILL post. Just not more than MAYBE twice a week. Or for as long as every two weeks.

With that said, I hope that you will stick with me and watch for new posts in the future. At this point in time, you might never know when I will write about my adventures in life, marriage and raising my kids.

Just know that I WILL BE around. Just not as often. I find it sad that some people base their reading on the fact of how often a person posts entries. It should be based on QUALITY of the work. Not on QUANTITY in the numbers of posting.

Post It Note Tuesday's With Supah... The disgruntled Edition.

Come play with us in the sandbox! I promise, we won't shove sand down your pants and give you a wedgie. Go HERE to make your stickies.

This week, I have a couple of things to get off of my chest. Yeah, I know, my chest ain't all THAT big. Hell, I have a real 'combo pack' going on. But we aren't here to talk boobs, are we?

Anywho, my two main pet-peeves this week is kids on Summer Vacation and Retail Shoppers. They both drive me insane. Only difference is in the environment and the situation. The kids are mine, so nothing much I can do there. But I used to work in Grocery Retail. My husband still does. Let's just say, it's not a job for the faint of heart, shall we?

April is for more than Easter. It's to Give Life, Give Hope....

Life. What a precious thing to have, isn't it? Most of us take it and all of it's gifts for granted. That is until something major happens and it makes you take a better look at that proverbial big picture.

That is how it is for over 100,000 people in the United States of America alone. Add in people all over the world, and you are looking at MILLIONS of men, women and children. Holding on to every single day as if it really is their last. Hoping for that one second chance.

Waiting for someone to give of themselves. Waiting....for a new organ, tissue, bone, or bone marrow.

Some will sadly die waiting for their turn. Some have been waiting only a few weeks. Some, a few months. And some have been forced to wait for YEARS to get "the call" to receive the Gift of Life.

During the entire month of April, those of us that have been touched by Organ/Tissue/Bone/Marrow Donation are celebrating Organ, Tissue Donation Awareness Month.

People that have been are a Recipient, a Living Donor, is a Donor Family, or a friend of someone who donated or received an organ/tissue/bone/marrow are banding together to spread the awareness of the need GLOBALLY, all around the world for people to SIGN UP 2 SAVE LIVES with their local Organ/Tissue Donation center.

Be it the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV), on a website such as www.donatelife.net/CommitToDonation, or Google-ing for International Organ/Tissue Donation Registration websites.

When you sign up to be an Organ/Tissue Donor, you are saying that you are willing to freely give someone else, after your death, a second chance to live on.

For me, it was a Cornea for my eye. That is the "outside window" that protects your inner eye from injury and enviromental infections that could otherwise sneak in directly and attack the eye its self.

Without my Donor's gift of sight, I would be COMPLETELY blind in my left eye. As a Stay-At-Home-Mom that was NOT an option. I wanted to see with BOTH eyes, my three young children grow, be able to keep BOTH eyes on them, be able to SAFELY cross a busy street and have more of my independence back.

If you sign up to be a Donor, you are a HERO! To not only the Recipient. But, to their family and their loved ones. We ♥ our Donors and their families EVERY day. They are NEVER far from our thoughts, hearts, and appreciation.

Please, take a few minutes out of your time today to sign up to be an Organ/Tissue Donor. It's free, quick, and simple. Let someone have a full life and a second chance.

http://www.donatelife.net/    http://www.organdonor.gov/     http://www.unos.org/

    

Hi-ho....A-Bleaching we will do.

There are days that I can hack it. Other day's I can't.

Today was can.

My nose has been just tore up from the floor up, thanks to all the freaky weather changes. One day, it's colder than Frosty's butt. Next thing I know, we have Spring in the air. Only for Old Man Winter to come roaring his was back in to town.

Needless to say, my sinuses, especially on the left side have been having lots of "plugged" days. Which in turn has been making my worked on eye teary, red and stingy. So, down goes the Sinus Medicine to open me up.

This morning, I have been trying to get the house back in order. With three kids, ages five to ten, you can imagine what the house looks like.

Being that I am one to refuse to clean everyone's messes, I had Bryce clean the table, chairs and bench in the dining room. With bleach cleaner.

Holy cow!! That spray can really do the job of a whole pack of Sinus pills from just a few squirts from the bottle.

As soon as I had breathed in the aroma of the Bleach, I noticed that my nose was doing something it's lacking. Taking in air!! Man, it felt good until....

It opened me so well, that I started to get teary eyed from the scent of the powerful fume.

Bryce did a pretty good job on the dining area furniture. And most of my upstairs is back together and looking like a normal family lives here. Not a bunch of savages from 10,000 B.C.

Now, on to the down stairs. I swear! A Stay-At-Home Mom's work is never done. Even when it is.

Look To The Sunny Side Of Life...

Honestly, I do my best to try and follow that old saying. I really do. Even in the worst of situations. But there are days where it seems just impossible.

Including this morning. It seems almost like what CAN go wrong, HAS gone wrong.Dryer is kaput (though Scott and his brother are going to TRY and fix it this evening). My left Sinus Cavity is ready to just explode. Which in turn is making my "worked on" eye (that had the Cornea Transplant) get red, irritated, and tear like the Hoover Dam.

Add in the mix that the kids have recently been just buck wild, not listening, complaining about one another and having arguments ensue about every ten minutes on average.

Makes for a hectic life, and a hectic household.

It's not easy being a housewife, a stay-at-home-mom, and the accountant, the cook, the referee, the waitress, the maid, the laundress, the nurse, the doctor and all of the other "hats of expectation" that us SAHM's wear on a daily basis.

All the while, you are TRYING to take care of yourself, your needs. In the end, apparently, you have to take care of YOU and make sure yourself that YOU are getting the care you need and deserve. Because everyone else is too self-centered to see that once in a while YOU need to be "catered" to.

Some ask me how I stay so positive through it all...My son's mental disabilities/delays, taking care of the house and the kids, being my husband's "right hand girl" and trying to tackle getting better after saving my sight with a transplant surgery.

Really, I think you need to tell me. Because I honestly do not know. Sure I have my days of feeling "worthless", or like I am nothing but a maid to everyone. Yes, I admit it, some days I feel "used" by my kids and my hubsband. I know I am valued and loved. But they don't always show it.

And I also admit, that on some days I can be much the same way. I don't always show how much I value, love, and appreciate my family. But I do with all of my heart and all of my soul.

So, even though today I feel like I need a chisel to open up my nostril, that I feel like someone is holding a lit candle to my eye, my nerves are frayed and I am desperately seeking my dryer back in to working order, I shall try my best to "look on the sunny side of what life has to offer".

Puke, Barney and Cats

What a way to start off the day the right way! And it's a form of starting off the morning that I haven't done in quite some time.

How about we start with your child getting up at five in the morning, only to vomit all over your family area carpet as you blindly scramble to find a semi-clean towel and shove it under your daughter's face in the hopes that you catch at least most of it.

Only then, after throwing up the meal from the night before, do you clean up the remainder of her "morning gift" as you barely see out your good eye.

Finally! You drift back off to sleep, only to once again hear the sound of your five year old once again vomit. But she learned from the last time to actually puke in to the towel, not on her blanket or the rug.

Then, thirty minutes later, you raise up, thanks to the hubby turning on the loud shower at six-thirty only to find Barney the Dinosaur staring back at you from the television screen. OH THE HORROR that my eyes met!! Ugh! I can't stand that purple child molesting freak of nature. That image of his toothy grin is now etched deep in to my cerebral cortex.

On to the kitties who are not very innocent this morning. As I came in to the kitchen to start my morning coffee routine, I noticed what looked like black dirt on my kitchen floor. Nope!! Scott said it was the coffee grinds I threw away last night before washing my pot. Apparently, they decided to jump my garbage can and try to steal food from it.

Yes, people!! I do feed my fur-children. But they act like they are starved for weeks on end. The second that BOTH BOWLS are empty, they meow and cry as if they hadn't had a meal in a month of Sundays.

So, I filled the bowl of food, as well as dumped the nasty kitty litter box. As I did, Weebles (the youngest) decided he couldn't wait like a good boy, and peed in the corner where the box sits BEFORE I could sweep.

After all that was taken care of and their water container filled, all three cats filed in to the box at one time...Talk about a packed house! Two of the three decided to take a dump right after the freaking box was cleaned out and "refreshed" with all new litter in the pan. Needless to say, I once again scooped the freshly cleaned box as to get the stench out.

As of now, I'm letting both of the kids sleep as much as they want. I'm giving them medicines as needed. Being both have colds, they can take the same thing. But one may have to go to the doctor for an ear infection. And Skyler has managed to now not only puke on my rug, but has officially spilled drink as well.

Hayley will be home later today. I can only hope and pray that she isn't sick, and won't get sick! Bryce has yet to wake and cause me any grief...But it's coming!

Here is to my Puke-tastic, poop-tastic day in Stay-At-Home-Mom Land!!